Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
