I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
