I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize
