but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
so let's talk penis.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
