just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Text me some of your sweat
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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