So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
