East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
