I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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