Pappa wants mamma naked
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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