walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Im just a social blackout drinker.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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