No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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