In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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