He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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