Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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