first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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