Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
