Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
If I had your ass I would rule the world
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
