is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize