Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
