My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
