Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
