Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
