Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Verdict: uncircumcised.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
