you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Randomize
