I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
