bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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