your room smells of hookers.
And success
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
