My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Randomize