god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
