I need help removing her.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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