Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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