11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
