So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I just forgot I was standing up.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
