She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize