I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
