FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
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Have her get a boob job while she's there, that way it won't happen again.
Her boobs are probably huge, that's why it couldn't balance, a flat chest is like a table.
Bottles of jack break for like, no reason.
Was the bottle empty? If not someone should slap that girl.
All sorts of stupid.
Party foul... dump her
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