google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
