Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
