After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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