You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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