It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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