Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
