Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
