I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
We are two peas in an std pod
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
