im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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