Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Me too!
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize