Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
