what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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