the day after is always just damage control
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
