If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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