even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
We need to get me chipped asap
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize